Programming

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1

J is one of the most widespread programming language with an insane level of difficulty that I personally have ever seen, not including esoteric programming languages (i.e. brainfuck, whitespace).

Are there any languages that /prog/ has found to be widely deployed but insanely difficult to learn? inb4 ASM

4

>>3
bump my anus
sage

5

>>2
Circuits are for faggots. Either learn physics or fuck off.

6

Well, this thread went nowhere. Thanks fuckers.

7

>>5
Physics is for faggots. Either learn pure mathematics or fuck off.

8

>>5
circuits is physics, dolt

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1

you will never suck your girlfriend's penis over the internet

5

>>4
I got an honorable discharge
I interpreted this... differently than you meant it.

6

>>5
Fuck you nigger, I sniggered.

7

>>6
Niggardly sniggering is not a racist term but inarticulate liberals would tell you otherwise.

8

>>1
How is this a problem? You can suck her penis in real life

>>3
Fucked analy or oraly? How little is that girl? How huge is her cock? please be more clear when you post

9

>>5
The kind of discharge you are thinking of is not really honorable.

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1

I am the 1000 of my GET.
VIP is my body, and kopipe is my blood.
I have created over 999 posts.
Unaware of /b/.
Nor aware of fchan.
Withstood bans to create many flamewars.
Waiting for one's arrival.
I have no regrets, this was the only path.
My whole life was Unlimited Troll Works.

2

OP's true faggotry revealed in a single post. Wonderful.

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1

The task:

Print strings from "a" to "zzzzz" without using any loop or conditional statements. Don't just write all 1000 permutations out by hand. The output should look like this:
a
b
c
...
aa
ab
ac
...
zzzzx
zzzzy
zzzzz


inb4 lipthfags and dead dogs using some obscure functionality of their obscure languages.

71

Since when is /prog/ full of idiots?

Here, have a trivial and fast solution in Python{2,3} (same algorithm can be easily implemented in most other good languages):


from __future__ import print_function

def f1(fs, i, w):
    w('a')
    w('b')
    w('c')
    w('d')
    w('e')
    w('f')
    w('g')

(Post truncated.)

72

>>71
Accidental sage, sorry.

73

>>71
Nice conditional, ``accidental'' pedophile.

74

>Shitty Project Euler-relaed problems

This whole thread

75

>>16
what language is this?

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1

This really is too much, Lambda. Your obsession with C has dangerously eroded your sense of reality. Why don't you adopt a nice and healthy lifestyle like the rest of us?

70

>>68
I had no idea you had such anger management problems.
EEEEEH EEEEEEEH EEEEEEEEH EEEEEEEH!!

It only cemented the evidence of your mental instability
HAHA. GO BAK TO UR PSYCHOLOGY BOOKS, YA FUKIN SCIENCE BOI. I BET UR GONNA PLAY PSYCHOLOGIST AND TRY TO FIT ME INTO ONE OF DA BOXES IN UR SILLY, TINY MODELS.

FROM WAT I'VE SEEN, DA RETOIDS ON 4CHAN USE A ONE-DIMENSIONAL BINARY (BETA N ALPHA) TO DESCRIBE ALL HUMAN BEHAVIOUR. ALL U PSYCHOLOGIST FUCKERS R HARDLY ANY BRIGHTER. LOOK AT FREUD'S MODEL: IT'S ONLY GOT 2 MORE DIMENSIONS, N EACH DIMENSION IS ONLY A LITTLE MORE COMPLICATED THAN A FUKIN BINARY.

JUST LIKE DA LEFT/RIGHT WING POLITICAL MODEL (THO ORIGINALLY A SPECTRUM, IT'S OFTEN SHORTENED TO A BINARY BY DA SAME FUCKIN RETOIDS WHO CLING TO DA ALPHA/BETA LABELS (WHY DA FUCK WULD U DECIDE TO MAKE A MODEL LESS USEFUL? DER'S A REASON U DON'T CHANGE ALL UR floatS IN UR PROGRAMS TO boolS, YA FUCKIN RETOIDS.)) CAN'T REPRESENT COMMIES (FUCKS WHO WANT RESTRICTIVE MARKETS N RESTRICTIVE SOCIAL FREEDOMS), UR STINKIN' PSYCHOLOGICAL MODELS AINT GOOD NUFF TO DESCRIBE ME ACCURATELY, N DAT'S 4 DAM SURE.

HERE'S AN IDEA 4 A NEW ONE-DIMENSIONAL SPECTRAL MODEL THO: HOW MUCH R U LIKE LAMBDA ARTHUR CALCULUS? I'M +1.0 AND UR AUTISTIC, SCIENTIFIC ANUS, ALONG WITH ALL DA FUKIN STACK BOIZ WHO CANT REED A FUCKIN STANDARD N BASE DER UNDERSTANDING OF C ON TRIAL AND ERROR (JUST LIKE SUM1 WHO WUD USE A SCIENTIFIC APPROACH IN DA RONG SITUATION, LIKE UR ANUS), ARE -1.0.

(Post truncated.)

71

>>70
eat a bag of dicks, faggot.

72

>>71
Where does one acquire a bag of dicks? Are they just the shaft, or do they include the balls too?
Are they all the same kind, or are there variety packs?
Do you cook them, or just eat them straight out of the bag?
I need to know this information before I can successfully eat a bag of dicks.

This reminds me of a doujin on SadPanda I read that was about Marisa giving Patchouli some mushrooms that actually turned out to be alive. The mushrooms were penis-shaped and came alive and fucked Patchouli. I suppose you could call them magic mushrooms, though not in the typical sense.

The interesting thing is that they were able to circumvent traditional Japanese porn censorship laws that usually dictate that phalli must be turned into mosaics. The mushrooms, while very penis-like in nature, were not actually penises, and thus didn't get blurred or have those silly thin black lines placed over them. If you know what I'm talking about (SadPanda, the doujin itself, or the censorship stuff), you're too far gone and maybe it's time to consider taking a break from the internet.

73

>>72
Yes.

74

L. A. Calculus (!!wKyoNUUHDOmjW7I), if you don't mind me (and my boyfriend) have some questions about programming in C to make you. Can you allow us to make these questions to you?
thanks
with love

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1

Ask a balding man-child learning PHP at 22 years old anything

2

How do you fancy PHP?

3

I hope I don't start balding in two years.

4

>>2 it's the first server-side scripting language I've learned so I don't really have anything to compare it to.

5

Why haven't you killed yourself yet?
Have you ever licked someone's butthole?
Would you rather watch a snuff film featuring a man or a woman?
What's your favorite reddit?
If you could blow yourself, would you?
What delusions are plagued by that would make you think you are remotely interesting or worth talking to?
Have you stopped molesting children yet?
Who's your favorite touhou and why do you hate kikes?
Would you please remove your hand from your pants while your reading this?
Have you read your SICP today?

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1

This is the worst thread of all time. Many will try, but none shall ever make a thread as bad as this one.

121

>>120
Are we baking a cake? I wanna lick the spatula!

122

>>37
The fat nigga at 2:00 looks autistic. I wonder who's his favorite pony and which 2hu he'd like to fuk.

123

>>120
But that's a mixture, not a solution!

124

>>123
Terrible!

125

JACKSON 53 GET

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1

I have a referral I want to give to a struggling friend, but it requires solid C++ skills and he hasn't coded in C++ in 1.5 years.
He's a big security guy and the company does national security; I think it would be great for him.

How can I help him brush up on his C++?
Our school's core was C++
and he's done some DirectX in C++
So the foundation is there, he just needs a reminder.

8

Friends don't let friends code C++.

Is it at least C++11, or are you basically telling him that you want him to be miserable?

9

>>8
I'm pretty sure it's C++11. It's a cutting edge government contractor for national security.

10

>>8
and im pretty sure its not. ive worked for the goverment before - and big sec firms. i was quite surprised at first when i realized they required us to use old tools. old as in stable and abandoned. thats the way they liked it. if there was a security flaw discovered in that code, wed often talk to a guarantor. some famous 0day exploits were known to us before discovery often had to read code instead of documentation - project managers unanimously told us this was pro tem. then a breach of security would happen in a matter of weeks, and id stay employed for a long time that way. you think laurent chavet was a phoney? if you bought that story about peeking the box code, youre phar from the truth. tell your friend, i.e. you, that working for a security firm is fuckhard for real men. so keep coding that shoujo manga interactive story python gtk+ getting CTS when big men do the job of protecting your files or step the fuck up.

11

phar
how

12

This could've been about me until you said

>>Our school's core was C++

Motherfuckers here only fux wit Java. I didn't start learning C until junior year (c++ was sophomore year), and I regret it a lot.

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1

Would it be possible for a wizard to create a universal Turing machine that had an infinite amount of memory?

Also, if we could master magic, do you think that it would be possible to create a separate pocket universe for a computer, that could perform exhaustive searches of an infinite problem space in a way that would seem instant when observed from this universe?

53

>>52
i c wut u did thar

54

>>47
I don't know any 12yo anime girls who are taller than 160cm.
I had originally planned some witty, sarcastic remark, but I couldn't think of anything.

Anyway, Mimi is nice - you have good taste. I haven't caught up for several months; I hope that Reiji hasn't raped her.

Yes, it's me, the guy who vexes you to no end.
And I will NEVER forgive you for that! It's nice to see that you're still around though.

55

Dubs, nice and aged.

56

If you account for time, it already has an infinite amount of memory with limited access.

57

A wizard would have to create such a device outside of the universe be necessity. The infinitly massive black hole caused by having something that can store an infinte amount of memory would probably kill him.

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1

Check out /g/ right now. IT'S HAPPENING

16

>>15
not my fault your computer is a piece of shit

17

Check out /g/ right now
Why would I do something stupid like that?

18

>>17
because there are more substantial threads and less shitposting than /frog/
get your head out of your ass, drop some acid, and realize this place is a garbage dump and your illusory superiority doesn't even make sense

19

>>18
Back to /g/ please.

20

Seriously why are people using GIF in TYOOL 2014?

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1

Hey there.

I kinda lost touch with programming for like one, two years. Depression came along, but now I'm taking medicine and I want to try again.

One of the places I missed the most was /prog/. The incredibly autistic humour and rare moments of brilliantism have a special place in my heart.

I want to say that I really, really enjoy the couple of minutes per day I spend here. Of course there are things we can do better, but this is part of my online family.

I love you. I'm back.

26

tadaima~

27

Go and do programming, don't be depressed, programming is awesome and mostly so is life.

28

>>23
There are a few N's in there.

29

>>28
>le pedophile sage

30

>>28
ニイーーーニイーーー!!

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1

I've been programming since around 2000.

I have a CS degree and have worked as a software engineer and consultant since graduating 5 years ago.

Nothing I do makes me excited any more. Learning new skills feels like a chore. I feel like I'm wasting my life building uninteresting software for companies I don't give a shit about.

Fuck. What now?

15

>>12
Isn't iceland where leenus torvaaldson is from, that's pretty hardcore with saunas and cursing at nvidia and shit.

16

>>15
He's was from Finland. Iceland is nice, because it has no niggers and less Jews while Finland is overrun with African refugees and feminists.

17

>>14
>le pedophile sage

Nice.

18

>>17
>le pedophile >le pedophile sage sage

19

>>16
Iceland is full of feminists too, the difference is that Finns are hardcore autistic barely civilized drunkards who like to murder each other with axes and go to saunas naked, while Icelanders are a bunch of uptight liberal dorks

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1

New meme announcement: "Sure, you're good, but are you Abelson good?". Put it to good use, /prog/!

54

>>51
who are you?!

55

>>51
U MENA /Πόλεκατ κεμπάμπς/

56

I'm releasing some really nefarious gases from my bumhole.

57

Sure, this thread's good, but is it Abelson good?

58

I'm on the verge of pooping and my farts are extremely stinky.

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1

I direct this appeal to all who believe in our state and our Board. If you were alone, what would you be in this world if the quality posts were the only thing you consider to be the community? You owe this to everyone! Don't tell me, "All right, but it's a bother to outspam the spammers and fight off the shitposters." You have never known what it's like to be shit-flooded into dissolution, otherwise you would know what a bother it is to be dissolute! Sometimes you read in the newspaper that a wizard committed suicide along with his toy languages because of the decay in our community. My dear /prog/sgenosse, these are not bad people! Secondly, that is not an easy decision to make! It must be easy for you to clean up this board of shitposters when you know other people would have given their lives for you!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZG9NXmuCaE

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>>65
I want to talk to people about what they believe, explore why they believe it, and how they view the world in that perspective.
People are stupid, throw grenades at them.

73

Asian here... Hitler was actually the good guy...

74

Jew here... Hitler was actually the good guy...

75

Hitler here. I was working with the Jews to give them a homeland.

78

>>78 GET, >>77,76 ARE FAGGOTS

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1

All right, /prog/, it is time for the ultimate challenge. Your task, if you are EXPERT to accept it, it to program something of reasonable complexity, in the language of your choice, how ever you see fit. In one year, you will reevaluate your code and comment on your design choices. Can you write code that will stand the test of time?

7

>>5
Fuck you, trie are way funnier than hash tables.

8

>>7
Return to /g/ you angsty teen!

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>>5
You may wish to make your hash table have a length equal to a large prime!

10

One year

This is way too long, I question my design choices only months, sometimes weeks after I write them in the first place.

11

>>5
I imagined your code would be shouted too.

Also, dubs.

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1

What is the worst client you've ever worked for?

2

your mom

3

ssh

4

telnet

5

Some guy in college, when I would do homework for money. He never paid me the final half, but offered to give me a blowjob instead.

I'm not sure if I should have accepted, because I got absolutely nothing out of that one, an it was a large project.

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[17:4] APTEasy

1

Well check it out, it is pretty legit. http://deavmi.github.io/APTEasy It basically makes using apt-get a dream. :D ;P In terms of updating package lists, installing upgrades and cleaning the apt-get environment.

2

Are you retarded or something? In what way does that make the life of the user easier?
It just echoes a lot of bullshit lines and calls apt-get <whatever>.
You even managed to make the user write one extra character.
apt-update to apte-update, seriously fuck off

here you have retard, your shit program reduced to an actually useful thing
updt() {
    sudo apt-get update
    sudo apt-get dist-upgrade -y
    sudo apt-get autoremove --purge -y
    sudo apt-get autoclean
}

3

I like poo on penis

4

hax my anus

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[18:13] primes

1

are there any primes made up of a prime number of prime numbers?

9

>>7
if 1 and 3 makes 13 then 5 + 5 = 55

10

Anonymous's conjecture: Every prime number p has a square root that does not belong to the set of natural numbers or whole numbers, but can only be a rational or irrational real value number that are not also members of the aforementioned set of naturals and wholes.

11

dubs kek'em

12

>>9
I didn't imply 1+3 = 13

13

>>10
Well yeah, that should be obvious.

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